Dumb Laws – A

By Jab

Dumb Laws by Letter State — A C D F G H I K L M N O P R S T U V W

Alabama | Alaska | Arizona | Arkansas

Alabama

  • It is illegal for a driver to be blindfolded while operating a vehicle.
  • Dominoes may not be played on Sunday.
  • It is illegal to wear a fake moustache that causes laughter in church.
  • Putting salt on a railraod track may be punishable by death.
  • Boogers may not be flicked into the wind.
  • Bear wrestling matches are prohibited.
  • It is legal to drive the wrong way down a one-way street if you have a lantern attached to the front of your automobile.
  • You must have windshield wipers on your car.
  • You may not have an ice cream cone in your back pocket at any time.
  • Masks may not be worn in public.
  • Men may not spit in front of the opposite sex.
  • You may not drive barefooted.
  • It is illegal to maim oneself to escape duty.
  • It is illegal to impersonate a person of the clergy.
  • Women are able to retain all property they owned prior to marriage in the case of divorce. However, this provision does not apply to men.
  • Incestous marriages are legal.
  • Anniston — You may not wear blue jeans down Noble Street.
  • Jasper — It is illegal for a husband to beat his wife with a stick larger in diameter than his thumb.
  • Lee County — It is illegal to sell peanuts in Lee County after sundown on Wednesday.
  • Mobile — It is unlawful to howl at ladies inside the city limits.
  • It is unlawful to wear women’s pumps with sharp, high heels.

Alaska

  • Moose may not be viewed from an airplane.
  • While it is legal to shoot bears, waking a sleeping bear for the purpose of taking a photograph is prohibited.
  • State policy states that emergencies are held to a minimum and rarely found to exist
  • It is considered an offense to push a live moose out of a moving airplane.
  • Fairbanks — It is considered an offense to feed alcoholic beverages to a moose.

Arizona

  • Hunting camels is prohibited
  • Any misdemeanor committed while wearing a red mask is considered a felony. This goes back in the days of the Wild West.
  • There is a possible 25 years in prison for cutting down a cactus.
  • Donkeys cannot sleep in bathtubs.
  • When being attacked by a criminal or burglar, you may only protect yourself with the same weapon that the other person posseses.
  • It is unlawful to refuse a person a glass of water.
  • You may not have more than two dildos in a house.
  • Glendale — Cars may not be driven in reverse.
  • Globe — Cards may not be played in the street with a Native American.
  • Hayden — If you bother the cottontails or bullfrogs, you will be fined.
  • Maricopa County — No more than six girls may live in any house.
  • Mesa — It is illegal to smoke cigarettes within 15 feet of a public place unless you have a Class 12 liqueur license.
  • Mohave County — A decree declares that anyone caught stealing soap must wash himself with it until it is all used up.
  • Nogales — An ordinance prohibits the wearing of suspenders.
  • Prescott — No one is permitted to ride their horse up the stairs of the county court house.
  • Tucson — Women may not wear pants.
  • Tombstone — It is illegal for men and women over the age of 18 to have less than one missing tooth visible when smiling.

Arkansas

  • The Arkansas River can rise no higher than to the Main Street bridge in Little Rock.
  • Arkansas must be pronounced “Arkansaw”
  • A law provides that school teachers who bob their hair will not get a raise.
  • A man can legally beat his wife, but not more than once a month.
  • Oral sex is considered to be sodomy.
  • Alligators may not be kept in bathtubs.
  • A voter is only allowed five minutes to mark his ballot.
  • Fayetteville — It is illegal to kill “any living creature”.
  • Little Rock — Dogs may not bark after 6 PM.
  • Flirtation between men and women on the streets of Little Rock may result in a 30-day jail term.
  • It is unlawful to walk one’s cow down Main Street after 1:00 PM on Sunday.
  • No person shall sound the horn on a vechicle at any place where cold drinks or sandwiches are served after 9:00 P.M.