Dumb Laws – I

By Jab
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Dumb Laws by Letter State — A C D F G H I K L M N O P R S T U V W

Idaho | Illinois | Indiana | Iowa

Idaho

  • Illegal for a man to give his sweetheart a box of candy weighing less than fifty pounds.
  • You may not fish on a camel’s back.
  • Riding a merry-go-round on Sundays is considered a crime.
  • Boise — Residents may not fish from a giraffe’s back.
  • Coeur d’ Alene — If a police officer approaches a vehicle and suspects that the occupants are engaging in sex, he must either honk, or flash his lights and wait for three minutes before approaching the car.
  • Pocatello — A law passed in 1912 provided that “The carrying of concealed weapons is forbidden, unless some are exhibited to public view.”
  • A person may not be seen in public without a smile on their face.

Illinois

  • You may be arrested for vagrancy if you do not have at least one dollar bill on your person.
  • You may be convicted of a Class 4 felony offense, punishable by up to three years in state prison, for the crime of “eavesdropping” on your own conversation. -720 ILCS 5/14-2.
  • You must contact the police before entering the city in an automobile.
  • The English language is not to be spoken.
  • Chicago — Law forbids eating in a place that is on fire
  • It is illegal to give a dog whiskey.
  • Kites may not be flown within the city limits.
  • Spitting is forbidden
  • In the Pullman area, it is illegal to drink beer out of a bucket while sitting on the curb.
  • It is forbidden to fish while sitting on a giraffe’s neck.
  • It is legal to protest naked in front of city hall as long as you are under seventeen years of age and have legal permits.
  • Champaign — One may not pee in his neighbor’s mouth.
  • Cicero — Humming on public streets is prohibited on Sundays.
  • Crete — It is considered an offense to attempt to have sex with one’s dog.
  • Cars may not be driven through the town.
  • Des Plaines — Wheelbarrows with For-Sale signs may not be chained to trees.
  • Eureka — A man with a moustache may not kiss a woman.
  • Evanston — Bowling is forbidden.
  • It is illegal to go trick-or-treating on Halloween.
  • It is unlawful to change clothes in an automobile with the curtains drawn, except in case of fire.
  • Fairfield — It is unlawful for “negroes” to be within county boundries from sundown to sunrise.
  • Freeport — It is illegal to expectorate from any second-story window.
  • Galesburg — There is a $1,000 dollar fine for beating rats with baseball bats.
  • Homer — It is against the law to use a slingshot unless your are a law enforcement officer.
  • Joliet — Town fathers, reflecting the pet peeve of hearing their town’s name mispronounced ‘Jolly-ETTE’ when all local folk know it’s pronounced ‘Joe-lee-ETTE’, made pronouncing it Jolly-ette a misdemeanor, unishable by a $5 fine.
  • Kenilworth — A rooster must step back three hundred feet from any residence if he wishes to crow. Hens that wish to cackle must step two hundred feet back from any residence.
  • Kirkland — Bees are not allowed to fly over the village or through any of Kriland’s streets.
  • Moline — Ice skating at the Riverside pond during the months of June and August is prohibited.
  • There is a ban on unnecessary repetitive driving on 23rd Avenue.
  • Morton Grove — You may not own a handgun Normal
  • It is against the law to make faces at dogs.
  • Orland Prak — No pool tables are allowed in a public establishment, because it supports gambling.
  • Ottawa — Spitting on the sidewalk is a criminal offense.
  • Park Ridge — Trucks may only park inside closed garages.
  • Peoria — Basketball hoops may not be instaled on a driveway.
  • Zion — It is illegal for anyone to give lighted cigars to dogs, cats, or any other domesticated animals.

Indiana

  • Baths may not be taken between the months of October and March.
  • It is illegal to sell cars on Sunday.
  • A person who dyes, stains, or otherwise alters the natural coloring of a bird or rabbit commits a Class B misdemeanor.
  • Oral sex is illegal.
  • A man over the age of 18 may be arrested for statutory rape if the passenger in his car is not wearing her socks and shoes, and is under the age of 17.
  • It is against the law to pass a horse on the street.
  • It is illegal for a liquor store to sell cold soft drinks.
  • Liquor stores may not sell milk.
  • Grocery stores may not sell any type of cold liquor.
  • You can get out of paying for a dependent’s medical care by praying for him/her
  • One man may not back into a parking spot because it prevents police officers from seeing the license plate.
  • Smoking in the state legislature building is banned, except when the legislature is in session.
  • Check forgery can be punished with public flogging up to 100 stripes.
  • Pedestrians crossing the highway at night are prohibited from wearing tail lights.
  • No one may catch a fish with his bare hands.
  • Men are prohibited from standing in a bar.
  • You are not allowed to carry a cocktail from the bar to a table. The waiter or waitress has to do it.
  • Drinks on the house are illegal.
  • Drinking from your own bottle in a bar can lead to your arrest.
  • You are required to pour your drink into a glass.
  • “Spiteful Gossip” and “talking behind a person’s back” are illegal.
  • State government officials who engage in private duels can be dismissed from their post.
  • All males 18 to 50 years old must work six days a year on public roads.
  • Mustaches are illegal if the bearer has a tendency to habitually kiss other humans.
  • Hotel sheets must be exactly 99 inches long and 81 inches wide.
  • If any person has a puppet show, wire dancing or tumbling act in the state of Indiana and receives money for it, they will be fined $3 under the Act to Prevent Certain Immoral Practices.
  • Anyone 14 or older who profanely curses, damns or swears by the name of God, Jesus Christ or the Holy Ghost, shall be fined one to three dollars for each offense, with a maximum fine of ten dollars per day.
  • A three dollar fine per pack will be imposed on anyone playing cards in Indiana under the Act for the Prevention of Gaming.
  • The value of Pi is 4, and not 3.1415.
  • It is illegal for a man to be sexually aroused in public.
  • Auburn — It is illegal to bike, roller-skate, skateboard, or inline skate in a commercially zoned area. For these offesnses, there is a fine of no more than $5 or the impounding of one’s bicycle for a period not to exceed 30 days.
  • Beech Grove — It is forbidden to eat watermelon in the park.
  • Elkhart — It is illegal for barbers to threaten to cut off kid’s ears.
  • Evansville — While driving on Main Street you may not have your lights on.
  • Fort Wayne — You may not sell or play on a radio broadcast, the record “It`s In the Book”.
  • Gary — Within four hours of eating garlic, a person may not enter a movie house, theater, or ride a public streetcar.
  • South Bend — It is illegal to make a monkey smoke a cigarette.
  • Terre Haute — No one may spit on the sidewalk.

Iowa

  • Kisses may last for no more than five minutes.
  • One-armed piano players must perform for free.
  • A man with a moustache may never kiss a woman in public.
  • It is a violation of the law to sell or distribute drugs or narcotics without having first obtained the appropriate Iowa drug tax stamp.
  • Dubuque — Any hotel in the city limits must have a water bucket and a hitching post in front of the building.
  • Indianola — The “Ice Cream Man” and his truck are banned.
  • Fort Madison — The fire department is required to practice fire fighting for fifteen minutes before attending a fire.
  • Marshalltown — Horses are forbidden to eat fire hydrants.
  • Ottumwa — Within the city limits, a man may not wink at any woman he does not know.